


Breathe

by RobronForever (tvlover9)



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Drabble, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 19:37:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6437581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tvlover9/pseuds/RobronForever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aaron's reaction immediately following Gordon's guilty conviction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Breathe

“Guilty."

Aaron hears the word but everything that comes after is drowned out by the roaring in his head. He knows his mom hugs him, crying. Cain clasps his shoulder, other people pat him on the back, offer congratulations, smile at him, he _knows_ they do, but he can’t feel, it, can’t hear their words. He sits there, not moving, not reacting, seeing everyone else moving around him, but it’s all a blur.In the back of his mind he worries about the numbness, but he can’t bring himself to really care. He knows people are talking to him, can tell his mom is trying to get his attention and when he doesn’t respond she starts to panic. She crouches down in front of him, he knows she is speaking to him, but he can’t focus on her words.Blackness encroaches the edges of his vision and he begins to feel lightheaded. His mom is shaking him, but he’s not sure what she wants from him.

Abruptly the shaking stops and his mom disappears. He’s not aware of anyone sitting beside him until he feels a soft puff of air against his cheek. Then, as if from far away he hears a soothing voice whispering to him. He tries to focus on the voice, but can’t. He feels a hand rubbing his back, and his hand moves searching for something to latch on to. For a split second he’s sure there won’t be anything there, and he’ll just reach and reach into the darkness, but a warm strong hand grasps his, intertwining their fingers, grounding him. He finally hears the words being whispered in his ear.“Breathe, Aaron. Please take a breath. It’s ok, you’re ok. Just one breath, babe, please. He’s going away, Aaron he’ll never hurt you again, but I need you to take a breath. Please, Aaron.” The pleading in the voice finally sinks in, and he opens his mouth gasping in a breath. As his lungs fill, the blackness around his vision begins to recede. He turns his head seeking out the source of the comforting voice. Their eyes meet and he releases the breath, as Robert continues to murmur quietly to him.“There you go, good, breathe in. God, you scared me Aaron.” Aaron’s eyes fill with tears as Robert’s voice break on his name. He opens his mouth to say sorry, but all that comes out is a shuddering sob, he snaps his mouth closed trying to contain the emotions now threatening to erupt from him.

Robert wraps his arm around Aaron’s shoulders, pulling him to his side. Aaron remains rigid, not wanting everyone to see him lose it. “I’m fine.” He mumbles to Robert. “I know. It’s just me and you though, Cain herded everyone else out.” Aaron’s shoulders relax and he tucks his face into Robert’s chest. Taking a deep breath, he allows the sobs to break free, his tears soaking Robert’s shirt. He can once again hear Robert murmuring to him, but can’t make out the words over the sounds of his sobbing. He breathes deeply, inhaling Robert’s clean crisp scent, allowing Robert’s strength and comfort to sink into him. He wants to look up at Robert, see the love he thinks will be in those eyes, but there’s still a small part of him that fears being so weak around Robert. A voice in the back of his head that says, “don’t show him how weak you are, he’ll throw it in your face, use it to break you.” He tries to quiet his breathing, wanting to hear Robert’s whispered words. “It’s gonna be ok, Aaron. He’ll never hurt you again. I’d give anything to take your pain away, and not just this pain, all the pain I’ve caused you. I’m so sorry, Aaron. For all the things I’ve said and done that have hurt you. You deserve so much better then me, but we both know how selfish I am, I can’t let you go. I promise, I’ll do everything in my power to never hurt you again, to protect you for as long as you’ll let me. Let’s be honest, probably long past that, cause we both know I don’t listen very well. I love you so much, and I know you don’t believe me, not yet, but I’m going to keep saying it until you do. In fact that is my new mission, to convince you how amazing you are and how much I love you, to cover all the horrible angry lies I’ve told you with sweet, honest truths. Even if you laugh at me and call me a sappy muppet, I’m going to get you to see yourself the way I see you, I promise I’ll never stop trying. I love you so much.” Robert stops talking, realizing that Aaron’s sobs have stopped and he’s listening intently to ever word Robert is saying. He waits, one arm still holding Aaron pressed to his side, the other hand clasped tightly to Aaron’s, blushing with embarrassment.

When Aaron doesn’t move or say anything, Robert starts to berate himself internally. He wasn’t supposed to say those things yet, it’s not what Aaron needs right now, he’s supposed to be a mate not confessing his love. He holds his breathe as Aaron pulls back from him, just enough for their eyes to meet. Aaron stares at him intently, his eyes searching Robert’s as if looking into his very soul. Apparently satisfied with what he sees, he tries to smile at Robert, but he’s not sure it comes off as much more then a grimace. He tucks his face into Robert’s neck and whispers, almost imperceptibly, not sure if he hopes Robert hears it or not, “I love you, too.” He feels Roberts pulse skyrocket, and grins to himself. He knows things are a long way from perfect, but for the first time in a long time, he feels hopeful. Gordon’s going to prison, his mom and him are in a good place, he’s getting to know his little sister, and Robert’s here. Robert, who he never would of imagined holding him like this, saying these things, hoping for a future with him. He moves away from Robert and stands, keeping their hands linked together, “Let’s get out of here” he says as he pulls Robert up to stand beside him. They walk towards the door, Aaron glances down at his and Robert’s hands, and feels a moment of apprehension, wondering if Robert will pull away as they walk outside where everyone is probably waiting for them. Robert knows what Aaron is worried about, and he doesn’t pull away just smiles and squeezes Aaron’s hand as they push through the doors, together.


End file.
